Mirror Mirror on the Wall, Who's the Most Righteous One of All?

"…strive for full restoration, encourage one another, be of one mind, live in peace. And the God of love and peace will be with you."

2 Cor. 13:11

Have you ever found yourself in a setting where you felt like a complete outcast? I was that girl recently when my husband and I attended a formal dinner function. Long story short, for three or so hours I listened to Christian ladies compare their six bedroom houses, $800 car seats, private schools, multiple Disney vacations, and housekeepers.

Let me just preface that this is a far cry from my life. I love my life, I'm comfortable with my life. My life truly is a blessing but it is far from lavish. I'm lucky to get a shower every day, make the beds, and get my kids to school without at least one snafu. And I'm not against the occasional indulgence. I prefer to buy nice things that will last as opposed to inexpensive things that continually need replacing. I also deeply appreciate those who work hard to provide for their families. Nor do I consider myself someone who gets jealous of what others have.

But for the first time in a long time, I felt very inferior and uncomfortable. I left with a convicted heart. I wish I hadn't been so bothered by the discussions around me. I wish I could've let it roll off my back and choke it up to the alcohol that was flowing among these women. But for some reason, nearly a week later this nagging feeling remains that I need to sort out my feelings. The Holy Spirit is not a subtle one, is He?

"Stop acting so proud and haughty! Don't speak with such arrogance! For the LORD is a God who knows what you have done; he will judge your actions."

1 Samuel 2:3

I've thought about those conversations a hundred times in the last 6 days. I've complained about it. I've talked about it. I have wondered why I care so much. I couldn't wait to find time this week to write a post centered around coveting material possessions and Matthew 19:23-24. I've spent too much of my time and energy fixating on how awful I thought these ladies carried themselves and how I was so thankful I'm not like them.

But as I've sat here gathering my thoughts, what I feel compelled to say is different. What I feel led by God to say is that I've learned something about myself...

I'm no better than those ladies.

God hit me over the head and made me realize that my heart is convicted not because of their boastful attitudes but because of my self righteous one. Just because I don't covet stuff or boast about money or possessions, I am no more righteous in God's eyes. In fact, I am equally unrighteous because of my pride.

"Jesus told this story to some who had great confidence in their own righteousness and scorned everyone else: “Two men went to the Temple to pray. One was a Pharisee, and the other was a despised tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed this prayer: ‘I thank you, God, that I am not a sinner like everyone else. For I don’t cheat, I don’t sin, and I don’t commit adultery. I’m certainly not like that tax collector! I fast twice a week, and I give you a tenth of my income…

Luke 18:9-12

OUCH! I was that Pharisee.

Do you know that in the NIV version of the Bible, the word "judgment" (and all other variations: judge, judging, etc.) is mentioned 393 times?!?

Y'all, that should make you stop and think. Nearly 400 times God makes it obvious for us to recognize not to judge others. With 100% confidence I can assure you that not a single one of those mentions of judgment falls in the "it's ok this time" category.

"For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Matthew 6:21

In all of my attempts to live up to the Proverbs 31 woman, to be a successful ministry leader, to teach my children about God's love for them, my efforts are in vain if my heart is not in the right place. I am still a sinner in need of a Savior.

"Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you- unless, of course, you fail the test?"

2 Cor. 13:5

I have been a Christian for roughly 11 years. I was 18 when I got saved and nearly half of the years following, I didn't truly understand what it meant to be a Christ follower. I may have been baptized and attending a Christian university, but my actions were no where near biblical.

When my daughter came along, I made a vow to God and her that I would finally start living the way God intended. Teaching her to love God was the MOST important parental responsibility to me. I wanted her to find a love for the Lord at a young age and I wanted her to learn by my example.

What kind of example am I setting for her, at the impressionable age of (almost) 6, if I am vocally reprimanding other women? What does it teach my daughter about God if I am condemning others and using God as a defense to my actions?

It teaches her to be self-righteous. To be judgmental. To have the attitude of a Pharisee.

I'm not teaching her to show grace, to love others as Christ loves the church, or to live the example.

If I examine myself to see if I'm in the faith, truly in the faith, I will see that I failed the test.

"Now we pray to God that you will not do anything wrong- not so that people will see that we have stood the test but so that you will do what is right even though we may seem to have failed.

For we cannot do anything against the truth, but only for the truth. We are glad whenever we are weak but you are strong; and our prayer is that you may be fully restored."

2 Cor. 13:7-9

Yes, I failed my test. But praise Jesus because in my weakness, He makes me strong.

"…But the tax collector stood at a distance and dared not even lift his eyes to heaven as he prayed. Instead, he beat his chest in sorrow, saying ‘O God, be merciful to me, for I am a sinner.’ I tell you, this sinner, not the Pharisee, returned home justified before God. For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.” Luke 18:13-14

I don't know about you, but I want to be the tax collector. I want to be the one who begs for forgiveness and is exalted by God. I want to be the one who's heart is so close to the Lord that a thought like "thank you Lord I’m not like them" never enters my mind. I want my heart to be so rooted in Christ that when I hear people speak the way these ladies did my instinct is to PRAY for them not put myself above them.

"Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy."

Proverbs 28:13

"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective."

James 5:16

As Christ followers, we are called to be transparent. It is our duty to be honest and real with one another. That was my goal for this post. Not to boast, brag, or exalt myself but to show you that anyone, everyone falls short of the glory of God sometimes. Don't be discouraged when you find yourself in a situation like mine. Instead, take the opportunity to learn and grow in your faith.

Let's challenge ourselves to judge less and pray more. Let's live transparently and strengthen each other as brothers and sisters in Christ!

So when I lay my head down tonight and say my prayers, I'm going to thank God for His grace, the cross, and Jesus. I'm going to thank Him for the opportunity to renew my mind. I'm going to humble myself and ask for His forgiveness and mercy.

I'd love to know how I can pray for you this week! Connect with me by leaving a comment, on social media, or via email!

Blessings,

Anna

#God #faith